POP QUIZ! with SHAYNA from SexyShayna.com

We are thrilled to present the SECOND of our website-gal interviews with Shayna of SexyShayna.com, a 19 year-old New Jersey native who came to our attention last year, as one of the hottest non-nude models we've seen on the net. Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking "NON NUDE?!?!?! Get F'ed buddy!" I know, I know. You think no boobies = less gooder. Honestly, take a look at this chick. OK, now pick your tongue up off the floor. Eh? What'd I tell you? Isn't she a marvelous piece of ass?

We tossed Shayna a handful of dopey-ass questions, and she gave us some less-than-dopey answers. Enjoy our little attempt at an interview...and before you begin... CLICK HERE...ahh, much better. OK, continue...

Steve C: Shayna, with all of the gigabytes and gigabytes of hardcore pornography on the web, and the millions of adult websites that exist, why should someone plunk down 20 bucks a month to see you almost-naked?

Sexy Shayna: Because I am real. People who sign up for my site get to talk to me and enjoy me at the same time. You cant talk to Carmen Electra while lookin at her in Playboy. (Well, you CAN...she won't talk back, but you can talk to her as much as you'd like. I'm not so sure I get the "real" comment, either. Real as opposed to THIS?. OK, fine.)

SC: You're nineteen years old and you live in New Jersey. If we had to guess, we'd say you're all-too-familiar with the phenomenon known as THE MALL. In your opinion, which Garden State mall could you spend the rest of your life in, and which one is such an awful shopping experience, that you wouldn't even go back on a dare?

SS: Hmmm, Honestly I think that the Freehold raceway mall is my favorite. Its big, and has a Cinnabon in it, enought said. As far as a bad experience, I have never had one with a mall. (Cinnabon. Right)

SC: On your website, your members can see you pose in a variety of outfits and settings, most of which feature you 'teasing' the viewer with your near-nakedness. Was there ever an outfit/setting that was proposed to you that just made you say "No. Not doing it. End of discussion. Next" ?

SS: Yea anything see through. (Ehhh, I'm not so sure about that. I could have sworn I saw some see-through panties in one of these shoots)


Even the worst chili fart at point-blank range would smell like roses from that fanny.

SC: In the BIO section of your website, in the "my favorites" list, next to 'Underwear'... you state 'I don't wear any'. HOWEVER, we have seen photographic proof on your site that you DO in fact, wear underwear. To this, we say 'liar liar pants on fire!' and demand you submit to us several photographs of you NOT wearing underwear. What say you to this, missy?

SS: Nope, wont do it. Takes away from the whole "tease" of the pictures. Besides, I only wear underwear for the pics, not all the time. (Someone get me this chick's phone number)

SC: We fully appreciate that your favorite band is RAMMSTEIN. What do you think singer Till Lindemann is REALLY trying to convey when he sings "Willst du bis der Tod euch scheidet treu ihr sein für alle Tage"?

SS: Wow, Looks like you did some research, haha. Im kidding. He’s asking if "you will love her always even till death." I believe its a play on wedding vows. I dont know, havent really thought about it, I listen. (Damn right, we do research. We ain't messin' around. Wow, she didn't screw up as much as she thought I would on that one.)

SC: We've noticed you're on the SPAZ fan website, and we're assuming you're aware of this. How has being featured on such a high-profile website affected your popularity, fan base, work schedule, and/or ability to retain important information?

SS: I think its done just as much as any other site Ive been featured on, I dont keep track. (You SHOULD, hon.)

SC: Hypothetical situation: A wealthy internet mogul approaches you, your boyfriend, and whoever is making command decisions for your internet career and offers you a one million dollar contract to do a series of adult videos. SIX over the course of one year, to be exact. Your take of this million dollars is well into the hundreds of thousands of dollars; money you're not going to see by posing almost-naked. Do you take the offer or tell this guy (and his money) to go screw?

SS: Id have to tell him to go screw. If I didnt have a family and no morals Id probably do it , but I have a young brother who looks up to me and I have way to much respect for my family to exploit myself in such a way. Plus it just disgusts me (but its fun to watch). ('Family and Morals' only gets in the way. Get rid of that shit. It's like an anchor)


Screw this website crap. I wanna be a pool boy!

Sexbagel steps in for the next question:
Sexbagel: Who do you think will win the 2004 Presidential election, and why? Who will you be voting for?

SS: Honestly I havent paid much attention, I hate politics but Im gonna go for Bush. (Greeeeeat)

(Buzz off, Bagel)
SC: In the SHOP section of your site, you offer your fans a custom photo shoot of you in any pose in any outfit for $125. If we send you two hundred bucks and a dead cat, will you bring it to a crowded mall and have photographs taken of you throwing it at unsuspecting old women?

SS: Hahahaha, Holy crap that would be the greatest thing ever but I dont think I have the balls to do it. Not even for $200 (OK, how's about three? Four?)

SC: You mention on your site that you enjoy "heading out to the strip clubs". Which of New Jersey's fine nudie bars is Shayna hanging out in, and which deserve to be burned to the ground for subjecting us to deformed, disease-ridden hags?

SS: I have only been to 2. Volcanic is okay but the girls could be better. The same for Delilahs, although there is one girl who was gorgeous and had the hots for me! (Hmm.....hardly makes her a strip club expert. By the way, "Volcanic" refers to "Volcanic Eruptions" in Egg Harbor Township and Delilah's is in South Amboy)

SC: If there ever comes a time when you grow tired of showing off your butt on the internet, what line of work/career will you pursue?

SS: I want to train Dolphins more than anything else in the world but Id like to open my own business. (Wow, that's a broad spectrum. training dolphins and opening a business. Someone send this kid to Wharton, quick!)

And now Sexbagel steps in for the final question of the interview:
Sexbagel: Finally... the square root of 144 is...?

SS: 12............ no I didnt use a calculator, there are some brains in this chick, haha.(ahh, yes. Some brains. Not enough to know that you don't need to use TWELVE periods "............" to illustrate a pause.)

If you found that the least bit entertaining, you should click on over to SexyShayna.com, and check out pictures of Shayna...almost-naked. We assure you that she is by far, one of the HOTTEST almost-naked chicks you will ever see.

(Thanks for Matt G. for helping us out on this one)