Strap-on Sally 18: Gina's Casting Couch
Gina Lynn is back, and this time she gets to pick out who's going to be in her new all-girl, all-dildo extravaganza!
Strap-on Sally 18: Gina's Casting Couch !
So fucking what?
First off, let me explain the process by which I have to get my mail to pick up these packages that contain such pornographich gold as
Strap-on Sally 18: Gina's Casting Couch... First, I have to slither off the couch, and pick out the proper ascot/smoking jacket combo to wear to get the mail. Do I go with the red ascot/blue smoking jacket? Yellow ascot/Red Smoking jacket? Should I wear slippers? Actually, that question is usually answered with a big fat "NO", because quite simply, I don't possess feet. I am merely sperm. Sperm who enjoys the occassional cigarette.
Anyway, the trek to the mailbox is always fun. I try to go at night, when none of the kids who live near my apartment complex are going to point and stare at a four foot-tall sperm cell slithering toward his mailbox to get his mail...Mail which will hopefully contain
PORN. My lifeblood. My whole reason for being. Hell, if not for the poor aim of some young buck on a porno set way back when, I might have just wound up down some chick's throat, or on some guy's rug...or worse, up a chick's nose...along with all the boogers and blow.
But I digress...heavily.
Strap-on Sally 18: Gina's Casting Couch is your standard lesbo dildo-fest...and I'm not saying that to downplay it; I'm saying that because all lesbo dildo-fests are masterpieces in my opinion. A group of chicks, one of whom is
Gina Lynn, a box o' plastic and/or rubber genitalia (none of which will ever squirt out one of my cronies), and some fresh sheets...all of the aforementioned make for one hell of an excuse ot beat your banana. If only these gals could learn not to speak during those horrible dialogue segments, and just jump right into the fucking we'd all be a lot happier.
For years, on hundreds of porno sets, I've told countless directors "Would you stop asking these idiot chicks to speak?!?" ..."None of them have any higher than a fourth grade education, and you're asking them to learn dialogue!"... Shit, all I read during my formative years was PENTHOUSE, HUSTLER, PLAYBOY, and SCREW...along with the backs of an occasional AIDS testing kit...and I can memorize more dialogue than these runaways.
Of course, no one listens to my commentary. All I usually get is
Hey Bill, Spunky's talking again!"...and then they all marvel at the wonderment of a slithering, talking, smoking-jacket-wearing sperm cell. I wish they'd just accept me for who I am...sheesh.
Wow, this is more of a therapy session than a porno review, I apologize.
Gina Lynn is a nice gal. Horrible boob job. Someone call Marty Feldman; he wants his look back...but a nice gal. Her romps in
Strap-on Sally 18: Gina's Casting Couch are great whacking material...and I would indeed whack to them. If I had a penis...ugh.
Spunky Von Spermenheimer