Ex-WARRANT GUITARIST JOEY ALLEN

In case you don’t know (and many of you may not), Joey Allen was the lead guitarist in WARRANT for many years. More importantly, he was their lead guitarist for their massively successful first two albums. Then, after the band recorded and toured for their third disc, Dog Eat Dog, Joey (along with drummer Steven Sweet) quit the band.

The great thing about guys who were once in successful bands, and then left while the band is still experiencing some success, is that more often than not, there’s a great story (or stories) waiting to be told. The hope is that they’ll be willing to share those stories, and not sugar-coat them.

Well, after receiving these questions back from Joey, I immediately wrote him back to request a picture of the wheelbarrow he uses to cart around his gargantuan balls. If only they could all be like this…

You know, come to think of it, I really should have asked him if he was TRYING to look like Art Alexakis of EVERCLEAR. Oh well, next time.

FoundryMusicSteve: I've checked out your website www.joey-allen.com, and in addition to having the shit scared out of me by that loud-ass flash animation intro, it looks like you've gotten back into making music. Is this a serious thing or just a hobby?

Joey Allen: The tunes are just a hobby. Although I would love to take the time to do one legitimate CD, and may someday do it, I do not think that I would ever be able to make enough money to support my current life style through music. I don’t think that it is being very realistic to say that I could without taking a huge chance and I’m not willing to do that at this point in my life. I’m more concerned with being present while my daughter grows up, putting her through college and things of that caliber as opposed to how many CD’s I could sell or how much pussy I could get. To put it plainly I have grown up and out of the whole ‘rock star’ attitude and life-style.

The website is very well done and has some thought put into it but the tunes received about 15% of my time and it shows.

FMS: You covered "Believer" with your new band. Does the world really need another copy of a Monkees song? Especially one that SmashMouth covered only two years ago?

JA: That was recorded in 2000, three years ago. And it wasn’t a band it was myself, a really good drummer friend of mine Todd Lane (no relation to Jani), one of my best friends Pete DeMarzo, a bass player bro and a completely untalented singer I was trying to mold that turned out to be a complete loser. It was more of a jam then a band. Who fucking cares anyhow...my 11 year old daughter loves SmashMouth, in fact I took her to meet them a few years back...Steve was cool to her...she still has their autographed picture and guitar pick on her wall in her bedroom. I consider that tune a Neil Diamond tune not a Monkees tune...he wrote it! Fuck it any how...it’s music...not rocket science. It was fun punking that tune out!!!

FMS: How long after leaving Warrant did you realize you had to get a "real job", and what did you wind up doing?

JA: About four years and I decided to get into computers. I received a degree in Electronic Engineering prior to Warrant so this was just an extension to that. I’m currently a Database Administrator and doing well for myself.

FMS: Do you think you're making more or less money with your 9 to 5 gig than you would had you not left Warrant?

JA: I’m not concerned with the ‘he with the most toys wins’ attitude. I concern myself with having fun with family, friends and having good health. I don’t need to tour across the US and hang with people that I do not know from Adam, kissing my ass, that I’ll most likely never see again. I’m very comfortable with the living I make. I know when I’m gonna get paid and I know how much. I also know that very few musicians that have reached the amount of success that I did have been able to go on to a second career and generate a decent living like I have.

FMS: After struggling for years as an unsigned act, when/how did you know you made it?

JA: Warrant never ‘made it’! We received success from the first two CDs but making it is a completely different level that we never quite reached...we almost made it and could of if it weren’t for the selfish decisions of one certain band member.

FMS:...and at what moment did you know that it was all over for Warrant (or at least YOUR time in Warrant)?

JA: This is easy. I was in Laughlin, Nevada at a gig listening to two or three wives/girlfriends yell at a promoter whom had done nothing wrong. I was standing outside the dressing room door watching it unfold before my eyes. A few of the other band guys were just letting it happen...I couldn’t fucking believe it...a few days later we had a meeting with a new label to secure a new deal...the meeting was at noon and at about 11:00am I received a call saying that Jani couldn’t get up for the meeting...I made three calls immediately after that call. One call to Steven, one call to Turner and one call to Dixon stating that I quit, and why. I never called Lane because he didn’t and doesn’t deserve my respect.

FMS: You've adorned your flesh with a number of very detailed tattoos. How do those go over with the other nine-to-fivers?

JA: It is no big deal around my work. I get respect from my co-workers on my knowledge and work ethic not the fact that I was part of a rock band for a few years. They do ask questions sometimes and I’m forthright about my experience. I have nothing to hide. It was fun while it lasted.

FMS: What do you miss most about being on the road with a successful rock band?

JA: I do not miss the road at all but being my own boss was sweet!

FMS: Hypothetical situation: Jani Lane calls you up and says "Joe, we want to bring you and Steven back for one last album and tour. After the disc is done, you'll tour for six months, make a quarter of a million dollars (after tax), and then you never have to see me again." Do you do take the offer, or do you tell Lane to go scratch?

JA: How can you trust someone that has screwed you out of money? How can you trust someone that has no regard for friendship, or business partnership? How can you trust an alcoholic?

Sorry for the vague answer but would you entrust your earning capability and go into business with the likes of someone that I just described?

FMS: Have you heard Jani's solo disc? If so, what do you think of it?

JA: I have not heard it. He is a good song writer. What he’s doing wasting away in clubs and not writing material for current top pop artist I have no idea. What a pathetic waste of time and talent!!!

FMS: A lot of up and coming musicians make errors when first establishing themselves (signing away their publishing, binging on booze and/or drugs, pissing away their money). If you had to do it all over, which blunders/pitfalls would you try to avoid?

JA: I would have been more selective on the people I surrounded myself with as far as accountants, lawyers and managers are concerned.

JA: I also would have kept jamming with Lars Ulrich and been in Metallica, ha, ha, ha... I was always into heavier shit from day one. When I jammed with Lars for about two or three months in 1981/82 he sucked, he was a nice guy but he was just learning how to play...shit we all sucked but he was outta control. The Warrant ride was fun as shit but the people involved, including a key band member, where just out of control on the ego side of things. I’m glad I made the decision to leave when I did. My life is really in a great place now.

FMS: At any point (especially during the filming of the "Heaven" video), did you guys ever look at one another in your respective white leather studded outfits and say "Holy shit, this is so queer!" ?

JA: Many times...at least I did. Hey, it wasn’t my idea I just jumped on the bandwagon on that decision. Fuck, that song/video sold a shit load of CD’s...so who fucking cares at that point. I think that it was Lane’s idea, but I could be wrong.

FMS: In the "Dog Eat Dog" liner notes, Jani Lane referred to you as "the most underrated guitar player on Earth" (or something to that effect, I don't have the disc in front of me), the implication being that you weren't very highly regarded as a guitarist. Where'd that reputation come from?

JA: I don’t know and I don’t care. I can handle my own on guitar and I really have no regard for any one persons opinion of my playing. There are some great guitar players in the world. There are the guitarist- guitarist...like Joe Satriani (who shreds) and then there are guitarist that just play from the gut like Dave Gilmore (who also shreds). The key is to remember that the only one that listens to your solo’s is yourself, so don’t record shit you hate!

I personally HATE over players and any guitarist who’s last name ends in xyz!

FMS: Complete this sentence "The person who caused me the most anguish during my years in the music business was _____, because ______ "

JA: The asshole bellmen that woke me up when I was hungover 5 days out of 7 while touring...bastards! DO NOT DISTURB...HANGOVER IN PROGRESS!!! Fucking pricks...ha, ha, ha!

FMS: Given the state of the music business in 2003 (record company consolidation, internet piracy, rock acts being ignored by MTV and radio), if you were faced with having to start from scratch with a new band (ie; The Joey Allen Project), would you do it?

JA: Not in a million years!

FMS: Finally, what city within the continental United States has the sluttiest women? Which city has the ugliest women? Which city has the fattest? Do these all fall into the same category?

JA: Continental U.S.? Why not Europe? All right...
Sluttiest Women = Dallas, Texas. God bless Texan women...well...most of them!
Ugliest Women = All women are beautiful to someone!
Fattest Women = Pick any town in the Midwest...say...Tulsa, Omaha, St. Louis...oh and the east coast during winter...ha, ha, ha! (Fuck you, I live in Jersey…they’re not all pigs. Most of ‘em are…but not all of ‘em)


So, do you think he’s got a problem with Jani Lane? Maybe just a little one? ..and he even said Lars sucked as a drummer (back in ’82, but still…he said Lars sucked).

Be sure to check out Joey’s website at Joey-Allen.com, and make sure you listen to that awful fucking cover of “Believer”. It’s a well-designed site though.

**Photo courtesy of Neil Zlozower**

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