Oh my... I fell for it again. I wasted time on another dumb questionaire.
1. The phone rings, who do you want it to be?
- The state lottery commission. They'd be calling to tell me I never have to work again because I just won a $380 million lottery.
2. When shopping at the grocery store, do you return your cart?
- Yes. I return it to the parking lot. Five feet from wherever I parked, with no consideration for the retarded man who has to collect them.
3. In a social setting, are you more of a talker or a listener?
- Hmmm... social setting... that's the thing you do with other people... umm, yeah. I listen.
4. Do you take compliments well?
- Never used to, but I'm getting better at it. Body Dysmorphic Disorder is a bitch.
5. Do you play Sudoku?
- What the fuck is Sudoku?
6. If abandoned in the wilderness, would you survive?
- Yeah, I would. As much as I have thought about just giving up, my survival instincts are too strong, and there are too many people I love, and I need to make sure they're OK.
7. Do you like to ride horses?
- Got kicked by one once. Gonna take some convincing to get me anywhere near one again.
8. Did you ever go to camp as a kid?
- Yes. Sleepaway camp, day camp, boy scout camp, you name it. My parents wanted me elsewhere.
9. What was your favorite game as a kid?
- A fun little game called "how far will the coke bottle fit in your hiney today" that my Uncle made up. That, and "Let's stare at the babysitter's tits until we get a boner"
10. If a sexy person was pursuing you, but you knew he/she was married, would you go for it?
- Loaded question. Pass.
11. Have you lied to get out of a date?
- Yes. "No honey, I didn't have to work. You just annoy the shit out of me, and I'd rather not listen to you complain all fucking night."
12. Could you date someone with different religious beliefs than you?
- As long as that religion doesn't hinder one's ability to be a sexual deviant.
14. Use three words to describe yourself?
- determined, obsessive, insecure.
15. Do any songs make you cry?
- Lately, a bunch of them are making me sad. Anything about the beginning/end of a relationship or the loss of a loved one.
16. Are you continuing your education?
- Spiritually, behaviorally, Emotionally...growth and learning opportunities everywhere.
17. Do you know how to shoot a gun?
- yeah, my father used to take me shooting out in the woods when I was a kid. My mom hated that.
18. If your house was on fire, what would be the first thing you would grab?
- A fire extinguisher. Then the phone...to call the Fire Department. Sheesh.
19. How often do you read books?
- I'm reading three at the moment. All self-help.
20. Do you think more about the past, present or future?
- The present. I try very hard not to focus on the past. I can't change it. The future hasn't happened. It's all about living life today and worrying about one day at a time.
21. What is your favorite children’s book?
- I don't remember much about being a kid.
22. What color are your eyes?
- Dark brown
23. How tall are you?
- 6'1"
24. Where is your dream house located?
- Someplace quiet, safe, stable.
25. Do you have a secret fetish?
- Yeah, a few too many. No, I'm not telling you.
26. Have you tried sushi?
- Yes. Loves me some tuna sashimi.
27. Have you ever taken pictures in a photo booth?
- Yes. Of my crotch.
28. When was the last time you were at Olive Garden?
- Years ago. the one by my house is always crowded. Puerto Ricans love the endless salad and bread sticks, apparently.
29. When was the last time you were at Church?
- My cousin's wedding. I was in it.
30. Where was the furthest place you traveled?
- Majorca, Spain's largest Island...when I was a kid. On vacation for my folks.
31. What was your favorite job?
- The one I'm doing now. Most days.
32. Do you like mustard?
- Yes. The Spicier the better
33. Do you prefer to sleep or eat?
- I used to LOVE to eat, and that's how I got myself up to 400 pounds. Now I try to sleep a lot more than the usual four hours a night I usually get
34. Do you look like your mom or dad?
- My father... yeah. Him.
35. How long does it take you in the shower?
- To bathe? probably about 15 minutes. To obsessively shave all of the hair on my arms and pubes? Probably closer to 30.
36. Can you do the splits?
- No, but last week I had the shits. Fucking food poisoning.
37. What movie do you want to see right now?
- 300. I still haven't seen this F-ing movie. I want to.
38.If you could fast forward your life would you?
- There's a little period I'd like to get passed right now, so yes... I would.
39. What did you do for St. Patty’s Day?
- Chilled with my dog.
40. Do you think The Grudge was scary?
- Fuck yes. As my shorts, which were rapidly filled with brownies after watching that fucking movie.
41. Could you relate to a character in Mean Girls?
- What the fuck is 'Mean Girls'? Oh God, another chick question.
42. Do you own a camera phone?
- Yes. I take pictures of my dog.
43. Do you have an “ex box” with pics and letters from past?
- Holy shit. I'm filling out a questionaire intended for women. What the hell is wrong with me today?
44. Was your mom a cheerleader?
- No, but my father has called my mother a "C***" a few times
45. What’s the last letter of your middle name?
- “n”
46. Do you like your middle name?
- I fucking LOVE it. I go by my middle name. Parents didn't want me being called 'junior'
47. How many hours of sleep do you get a night?
- about four usually. I'm trying to take naps more.
48. Do you like care bears?
- Holy shit. Another girl Question. How did I get so deep into this without realizing... trudging on...
49. What do you buy at the movies?
- Tickets. Diet coke sometimes
50. Do you know how to play poker?
- Nope
51. Do you wear your seatbelt?
- If it didn't mean getting a ticket, I never would, but I don't like getting pulled over so I do.
52. What do you wear to sleep?
- boxer briefs
53. Anything big ever happen in your hometown?
- Yeah, I left. I heard there was a parade. Actually, it's a snooty haven for McMansion owners
54. How many meals do you eat a day?
- my trainer wants me to eat six times. My stapled gut won't allow it.
55. Is your tongue pierced?
- No
56. Ever meet anyone you met on the Internet?
- Yes
57. Are you single?
- Um, hmm. No?
58. Do you like funny or serious people better?
- Funny people. Take your serious and shove it up yer fanny.
59. Ever been to L.A.?
- Sure did. Don't like it.
60. Did you eat a cookie today?
- No
61. Do you use cuss words in other languages?
- Yeah, my trainer is Honduran. He taught me a bunch. Workouts are fun when you can spew latin vulgarity
62. Do you steal or pay for your music downloads?
- I used to download obsessively. iTunes is so much easier.
63. Do you hate chocolate?
- Eh, not a fan of sweets
64. What do you and your parents fight about the most?
- We barely speak. Less time to fight.
65. Are you a gullible person?
- Everything you see on the internet is real.
66. Do you need a boyfriend/girlfriend to be happy?
- No, I don't. I really LIKE having someone in my life, and would love to wake up next to someone I love, but codependence is unproductive..
67. If you could have any job what would it be?
- Extreme wealth and retirement
68. Are you easy to get along with?
- Oh, Incredibly. Hey, where'd everybody go?
69. What is your favorite time of day?
- Just before I go to bed. Sleeping in on the weekends..
