SPIDER-MAN 2
Yeah, I realize it's been ages since I pried my leafy green ass off the couch and typed up a goddamn review. I sincerely doubt any of you assholes missed me, though.
You see, the boss had me
reviewing so much PORN that I was a little...well...disinterested in video games.
This has changed with the arrival of
Spider-Man 2. My PS2 has been dusted off. My trigger leaf is getting back into shape, and the axe is sharp as hell. Stock boys beware! That's right; Brock is back, and he's a web-slinging vegetable to the Nth power, you sonsabitches!
The sheer scope of
Spider-Man 2 is enormous... I mean, it blows away that of the first
Spider-Man, and I loved that game.
You know what I REALLY loved about the first game? The fact that you could swing from clouds. Yeah, those chase sequences where you were swingin' after the Green Goblin were only made easier by the fact that you didn't have to be hooked on to a BUILDING to swing after him.
Well, the fine folks at Activision fixed that little glitcheroo in this game. You actually have to be attached to a building to swing a web from it.
oh well, small consolation.
The moves take a bit getting used to, and you have to BUY new moves with "Hero points". No worry, though. I'm sure there's a cheat around that. I'm not much for helping people to begin with, so why the fuck would I want to zip around the city chasing lost balloons, beating up bank robbers, or rescuing dipshits on a sinking boats in the Huson River, when I could be slicing up a stock boy with my handy dandy axe?
Speaking of which, there's a zit faced pecker-head in my sights. I'd better go get him before he makes a move for my copy of
Spider-Man 2.
Go get your own, asswipe. This one's mine.