BEHIND THE EYES OF HATRED

So I'm on a date with this hot piece of zucchini ass (curves like you wouldn 't believe) and I pop in
She doesn't get it and keeps pushing me away, grabbing the phone to dial 911. After a brief struggle, I finally agree to take her home (yeah, right). Instead, I dump that soft zucchini bitch by the side of the road, and tell her if I ever see her again, I'll peel her to the insanely choppy riffs of "I of The Enemy."

Okay, so I'm not exactly Casanova. Halfway through this nerve-splitting, fuck-rod of an album, I feel more like Buffalo Brock. I want to eat that chick's seeds with a side of parsley and a nice Chianti.

I didn't know there was a difference between types of metal, but I'm broccoli, so what the hell do I know? These guys claim they are a combination of "black metal" and "power metal" which gives you a kind of metal to psych yourself up before a feisty date, or a mission on the latest GTA, or a random shooting spree.

On "Retribution" and other tracks, lead singer Matt Difabio sounds a lot like the little girl from The Exorcist (he does the hoarse barking thing really well)-- and that's the whole point of
Well, seeing as how I ruined it with that chick, I'm going to give this album another listen, spank it until my ceiling's dripping with green love-junk, and play that new Kennedy assassination video game. Heh, single bullet my ass. I'm gonna use a semi-automatic.