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RED FACTION 2
Stu-fucking-pendous. I know I’m stingy with my reviews on here but holy shit... RED FACTION II just kicked my fucking ass all over the place. I keep telling myself I DON’T like First-Person Shooters (Goldeneye, Medal of Honor, etc) but I’ll be damned if this isn’t some of the most fun I’ve had in between playing Vice City for the last few days. Steve C’s lucky I didn’t slip Britney’s Dance Beat (Foundry Rating: 9 out of 10) in the case when I gave it back to him.....not that I have......ahhh fuck you, it improves hand-eye coordination AND gives me the chance to dance backup for Britney. Got a problem with that? Psst....Steve. Have Brit back by Thursday if you can. I just beat “Oops I did it again” and wanna try “Don’t Let Me Be the Last to Know”.
Ok, back to the world of senseless violence that those dopes on 20/20 think will turn us all into genetically enhanced prostitute-killing criminals. Lets give you a quick plot rundown. Chancellor Sopot, who looks like a clone of Josef Stalin, is your typical evil politician who presides over your city. You are Alias, one of many specially engineered super soldiers created by Sopot to keep the populace in line and a tight grip on the city. However, he’s recently come to fear the possibility of an uprising by you and your comrades. Luckily for you and the plot, it’s Bastille Day 2050. Your mission is to assassinate Sopot, plowing through many different levels and his elite guard to get to him.
On to the many, many strengths of RFII. The gameplay is just stunning. As with most of the PS2 shooters, you use the 2 analog sticks to control movement. The left stick moves you forward and back as well as allowing you to strafe. You’ll use the right stick for aiming up/down/left/right. The shoulder buttons (R1, L1, etc) allow you to fire. And fire you will, chief. Grenade launchers, rail guns, double fisted pistols and DOUBLE. FISTED. UZIS. are only a few of the weapons at your disposal.
Level design is quite snazzy as well. As you traverse through office buildings, sewers and military installations, one feature stands out. It’s called Geo-Mod Technology. Those of you that didn’t play RF1 are probably unfamiliar with this little feature. Let me explain it to you. See that wall over there? Don’t like it? Blow it up. GET RID OF IT. IT’S GONE. This goes for EVERY WALL in the GAME. LOTS of freedom here. Lots of secrets too.
After all this, the multiplayer is the equivalent of a 3 way-lesbo-fest hidden in the Britney game. (I ripped the DVD. Only 50, 857, 629 more lines of code to go.) Ok, close your eyes. Take yourself back to 1997/98. Think college and think N64. Remember Goldeneye? Remember how much fun it was to grab that fucking grenade launcher and just murder all you friends and roommates (in the GAME not in REAL FUCKING LIFE, 20/20!!!)? Well, those memories will just come flooding back when you start the multiplayer in RFII. Options abound here, with customizable bots, weapons and unlockable arenas as you progress through the story section of the game.
If you like shooters, guns, violence or anything else remotely masculine, pick up Red Faction II. If not....well, get that Weezer shirt out of the laundry and find a fat chick in a Dashboard Confessional shirt. That’s probably more your speed.
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