MUSIC AS A WEAPON TOUR 2003
MUSIC AS A WEAPON - March 26th, 2003 - Hammerstein Ballroom, NYC
DISTURBED, CHEVELLE, TAPROOT, UNLOCO
This was a real treat for me, because I was not even planning on seeing this show until about 24 hours beforehand. A co-worker (at the day job, that is) asked me on Monday if I wanted to see DISTURBED at Hammerstein, because he had an extra ticket. It took me about a second to say 'hell yeah" simply because the last time I got to see Disturbed perform was at the very same venue, roughly a year and a half ago, and they practically ripped the roof off the place. I wasn't about to turn down another chance to witness that mobscene. I didn't find out which other bands were playing the show until about an hour before we got to Hammerstein. Off I went, adorned with my favorite pair of biker boots and fire shirt (man, I love my fire shirts) with some cronies to see a show...I bring up the boots and fire shirt, because they become intergral parts of the experience later on.
I want to point out a few brief observations before I comment on the bands.
1. Hot chicks at rock concerts are not a thing of the past. There was some quality ass traipsing around the crowd. Belly shirts, tight leather pants, and big juicy hooters were scattered through the crowd like tinsel on a Christmas tree. A fine showing of lovely women. Now, the pig-to-hottie ratio was still at roughly 6:1, meaning you had to scan by approximately six chicks who would be more at home with a saddle strapped to their backs than wearing hip-hugging jeans, but it was worth picking through them to find the hotness.
2. Women with pretty boobs need to show them off more often. There were far too many cows hanging their udders out for the crowd to see (blondie in the upper tier, you know who you are). I mean shit, once or twice is great for crowwd morale. I love boobies. Everyone loves boobies. Show us your boobies. Every three seconds though? Jesus piglet, give it a rest....and we sure as fuck don't want to watch you pull your twat out from under your gut. You flashed us forty-seven times. We got tired of watching your southward-pointing nipples hang over the railing. Sit down and give the skinny girls a chance. For the half-dozen or so hotties who unleashed their marvelous cannons. I salute you.
3. Shirtless juiceheads smashing into each other looks gay. Guys, you want to work out? Fine. You want to see a show? Awesome. Why the fuck do you need to get totally wasted, rip off your shirt, and roll around on the floor with other shirtless men? I swear, I saw most of you walk in with women (many of whom were very attractive). You rolling around on the floor, smashing into your drunken crony isn't reinforcing your heterosexuality...and it's going to get you thrown out on your ass if you smash into enough non-shirtless-juiceheads. Keep your shirt on. Enjoy the show.
4. Red Bull and Vodka is devil-juice and should be consumed in moderation. You don't need to drink yourself blind just because you're at a show. It's certainly your perrogative if you'd like to, but for crying out loud, maintain some balance.
5. Barbed wire tattoos are not cool anymore. Men and women should really stop getting barbed wire tattooed on their arms.
6. Fire shirt is like a fucking lighthouse for wayward drunks trying to find their way through a crowd. No matter how I positioned myself, even if I was up against the soundboard barricade, every fucking drunk prick in the room tried to smash by me to get to the front or back of the room. I'm convinced it was the fire shirt.
7. Biker boots are for shit on beer soaked floor. You'd think I would have learned this after working in nightclubs for years in Boston. Nope. Didn't sink in. I'm an ass, and my big black biker boots on a beer-slicked theater floor provided exactly the right combination of elements to remove any friction between me and the ground. The drunken juiceheads that were rolling all over one another on the ground nearly took me out because of my stupid fucking boots.
With that said, on with the review.
UNLOCO - Korn from Texas. Granted, their single "Failure" is very melodic, and fairly anti-Korn in nature...but every other song in their opening set is standard nu-metal fare. I'm fully convinced that the major labels will not rest until they've beaten yet another genre to death. I can hear the A&R guy at Maverick now, "What? They sound like Korn? Sign them!"... 'nuff said. Didn't blow my hair back.
TAPROOT - "Poem" is a great song...makes me want to roll around on the ground shirtless with a bunch of sweaty men...uhh...I mean it makes me want to rock out. It's cool, it's hooky, and that's why it's all over MTV and radio....and that's also why it's the last song in the band's set. Frontman Stephen Richards has the singing/growling thing down perfectly, but the songs weren't hooky enough to showcase it well. These guys shine when they're cracking you upside the head with a great riff, and building it up into a strong chorus. We know they CAN do it. They're not doing it often enough.
CHEVELLE - I've had
Wonder What's Next for a while, and the singles "The Red" and "Send The Pain Below" are definite strong points for these guys on the disc and in the set, but I didn't realize how good they were live...even though I think I saw them on Ozzfest last year...apparently I wasn't paying close enough attention. They're a tight band; great chops, and on-key vocals really make them stand out. The big single, "The Red" was the last song in the set, and the crowd (which was filling in nicely) seemed to really like it.
...and Now we pause for a word from Duff McKagan, former bassist for GUNS N' ROSES, who either has a radio show of some sort, or is doing some mocked radio show in order to sell records. Between sets, over the PA system, there was, what sounded like a snippet of a radio show hosted by Duff McKagan. It was hard to tell, to be honest, because my ears were fucking ringing at that point, so he could have been selling used cars, and it all would have sounded the same. Regardless, I don't need to know what Duff is selling to know that his delivery stinks, and after trying to find SOMETHING online about Duff and a radio show, or a Duff-hosted special...and not coming up with ANYTHING, I can only assume that Tower Records has some kind of sponsored audio clip (featuring McKagan) that plays during shows to hawk CDs. Whatever. You could barely hear anything at that point in the evening other than a constant ringing in your ears, so I'd say it's not the most successful ad campaign. Turn it off. Please...OK, break's over
DISTURBED - Hoofah. How many different ways can I kiss this band's ass? First of all, the force with which these guys take the stage is like a dump truck crashing into a locomotive crashing into a dynamite factory. Every kickdrum hit shakes your rib cage. Every time Dan Donnegan strikes a power chord, you feel your head thrusting forward in the obligatory "Beavis and Butthead" thrash movement, and David Draiman growls like he's posessed. They commanded that audience so well, that there were several times when I thought if they'd told us to rip each other to shreds...we would have...willingly...even though the shirtless juiceheads were doing a bang-up job of tearing the shit out of one another without much prompting. My one criticism of Disturbed is of lead singer David Draiman's preacher-shtick. He's got this evangelist delivery when he speaks to the audience, and when done in moderate amounts, it's fine. It's his shtick, and he doesn't break character. The last time I saw Disturbed at Hammerstein Ballroom, he kept this banter to a minimum. There was a little too much preachy, heavy-metal-is-so-cool-and-you're-all-my-brothers-and-sisters shit for my taste. What will be really interesting is to see if these guys go down the road of having to play nightclubs in about ten years, is Draiman still going to be doing the preacher act, or will he have moved on? Only time will tell. Their stage set-up was very evil; stone columns, large red lights, and the multi-faith symbol from the cover of
Believe hanging in the background. They played about ninety minutes of smash-your-buddy's-nose-through-the-back-of-his-puny-skull metal, and mesmerized the crowd. Even the record company suits who flanked the crowd looked like they were into it. One thing Draiman mentioned that was true was the diversity of the crowd. It might just be a New York City thing, but the crowd was about as multi-racial as you could see. Considering heavy metal is traditionally music for pissed-off white guys, it was interesting to see so many black, Chinese, and Indian faces in the crowd, all pumping their fists, singing along...and singing along AS LOUD AS THE BAND at times....a true sign of anthemic songwriting.
Great show. I'm so glad I got to see Disturbed again. I can't hear a fucking thing. Next time I'll bring my earplugs.
