ISLAND FEVER 2
One day, a few months ago...maybe longer, I'm not sure how many. I'm a fish, and my sense of time or math isn't so hot.(The only time I worry about math is when I'm counting how many times my big schwanz bangs on the rocks on the river bed when I'm trying to swim upstream to mate). Anywho, a while back, I swam my fresh-water self to Hawaii (yeah, I know. Hawaii is in the middle of the Pacific Ocean. Bravo for you. You paid attention in fourth grade. Shut the fuck up, this is MY story), and what did I see when I poked my li'l salmon head out of a small pool at the bottom of a waterfall???
Tera Patrick getting banged. That's right. Magnificent piece of human ass,
Tera Patrick, was getting shtupped by some lucky white fella with a prick smaller than mine....right out in the open...for everyone to see.
What were they doing, you ask? Well, at the time, I had no idea. However, when I checked the old FoundryMusic.com PO Box this weekend (yes, they let the salmon check the PO Box every so often), a copy of
Island Fever 2. THIS is what they were making that day. Who knew?
Island Fever 2 is one of those porno flicks that tries desperately to pass itself off as a legitimate film. Granted, it doesn't try as hard as some others I've fast-forwarded through, but there's way too much make-out footage between
Tera and lucky white guy.
Don't get me wrong, I'm all for pretty scenery in my movies, but you can fit a whole lot of butt-fucking on the field these two were occupying for their passionate lovemaking ritual...blech.
The other thing I don't like is that it was directed by a fella named "Joone". I don't trust anyone with a one word-long name. Get yourself a REAL name, dude...like, oh, I dunno... "Big Dick Salmon".
Honestly though, I'm nit-picking.
Island Fever 2 features some of the most BEAUTFUL women in porno today, including my lady
Tera (I WISH she was my lady, but
Evan from BIOHAZARD will use me to beat someone to death if I make a move on her)... and
Devon, a chick who I would easily swim upstream for.
Good bangin'. Sometimes it takes a little while to get to it though.
